chokeslam fridays:volume 3

I know its Saturday now, but this is my damn blog.


*sigh*
Why, oh why must these hos make me have to justify my thug? I think its safe to say that if I wasn't pregnant, I'd be locked up for monkey-mud-hole-stompin one of these unruly tramps. And so the story goes: Wayyy back last summer I was kickin it with this cat named "Baron Von Sloompen", JUST kickin it. He was nothin more than a homey to me. We didnt do shit.(Well aight, we did somethin ONCE) I wasnt feelin him all like that though, that was what you call an 'error of judgment'. Well anyways, some kinda way his BabyMoms (that he WASN'T with at the time) finds out, and yadda yadda. She never came at me on no bullshit though. Just know that. Anyway "Baron Von Sloompen" ends up gettin knocked and sent to the Pen on some drug charges, etc. So fast forward to tonight, I'm at the carnival walkin and I see one of my ex-homeboys (now he really WAS just a homeboy) and I see "B.V.S's" BabyMoms wit him. So "Pharrell" speaks to me, and we say the "Whassups" and thangs, cause I aint seen him in a while (obviously cause he been wifin this 19 yr old, big chinned, hooked nosed ho with two kids BY TWO different niggas might I add). So I'm go on bout my biz after that. Then my homegirl is like "You heard her?", I'm like "Nah...what she say?" Homegirl goes "She told Pharrell 'not unh, dont speak to her'"...I laughed to myself. I hate insecure/childish hos. You got somethin to say? Say it so my muthafuckin ears can catch it, ya diggski? So I go "YO! You had somethin to say?" Goin back up to her, she all givin me this stank ass look, and she says "I aint say nothin" Wit a lil attitude and shit. Ya'll aint knowin man. I was ready to deck that bitch at that exact fuckin moment. So I was like "I bet you didnt, but incase you ever do feel like sayin somethin, you say it loud enough for me to fuckin hear" True story. The bitch is still lookin dumb as I'm turnin around walkin away. Ho, sit down. Dont act like I want the nigga you with right now, cause I'm guessin thats her reason for tryna pump out more crunk than she can take in. I do NOT want that nigga, rest assured. Nigga dont even have a steady income. WTF? He works at a fuckin grocery store and gets paid off tips. Babygirl, you gonna have to do better...GET LIKE ME and get a nigga with a dental plan, who can AT LEAST take care of your child. I'm bein so fuckin honest right now that it aint even funny, but I was bout .2 seconds from punchin that bitch in the neck. Dont try to play me yo. Dont pop gangsta when I turn around, but when I come to you get all meek and tenderized and shit. Whooo. I think I'm more mad that I cant fight her than anything else. Yeah, yeah...fightin might be childish to ya'll but...FUCKALLAT, these hos be needin to be sat in a downard manner...and I'm here for that.

dat ass got tagged..

AGAIN. I'm lookin real wack-like with 3 posts in one day. Fuck it though, the homie Charles tagged me (you gettin REAL popular in this blog, bruh..lol) So...here goes.

Two Names You Go By:
1. Dominique/Nique

2. Sis (only my mommy can call me that)

Two Things You Are Wearing Right Now:
1. Air Brushed Jeezy Shirt
2. A Bra

Two Things You Would Want in a Relationship:
1. A LIL FUCKIN HONESTY PLEASE!
2. Cant-Sleep-At-Night-Only-Person-You-Care-About-Mary-J-Blige-Real-Love


Two Things You Want Really Badly At This Moment:
1. It to be September 24th so we can get this labor and delivery thing on and poppin.
2. To get a grasp on what I wana do for the rest of my damn life.

Two of Your Favorite Hobbies:
1. Madden on the PS2...and I'm niiiiiice.
2. Kick Collectin


Two pets you have had:
1. Boobie
2. Spencer

Two people who will fill this out:
1. Charles LoL
2. Whoever else feels like it

Two things you did last night
1. Went to the carnival, and ain't ride one fuckin ride.
2. Went to class.

Two Favorite Places to eat:
1. Applebees

2. My Mamas kitchen

Two things you ate today:
1. Cinnamon Toast Crunch
2. Prenatal vitamins


Two people you Last Talked To:
1. Arica
2. My damn self

"im a breath of fresh air in a fresh pair"...

So this is probably due to Charles puttin them gotdamn shoes up yesterday...I hadda give love to my all time favorite dirt kickers. See, you'll NEVER catch me walkin around in a un-fresh/un-crisp pair of Nikes, Jays or designers. Yeah, I fucks with stilettos and all that, but kicks are my heart. It all started when I got a fresh pair of AF1 highs when I was a baby..(aight they wasnt AF1s...but them ugly ass white baby shoes that EVERYBODY had) Now I got a fetish for kicks, shit...maybe even an obsession..they gotta be some non-conventional color, or have a DOPE ass design. I take this shit very serious lol. Ya'll dont hear me though. Peep my favorite kicks.


Those is my pride and joys right there. They only get worn for special occasions. I damn near had a fuckin HEART attack when I was in B-More and seen those. I LITERALLY screamed.



I got these WAYYY before the whole "Burberry/Louis Vuitton" explosion on kicks happened. I had to retire em though, cause another thing I cant stand is for ANYBODY to have my kicks. They get laid to rest real quick-like.



These also got laid to rest. I escaped gettin locked up cause of those shoes, not once, not twice, but THREE times. I only rock those when I feel like I'mma be on the run or some shit like that. Now, I don't really believe in luck...but gotdamn, what would you call that?!


Those are my faaaavorite designer kicks. The Coaches and I got the matchin purse somewhere in my closet. *shrugs*


Last and FA'CERTAINLY not least...my lavender/fuschia J.O.s. *sighs* tell me those aint the two prettiest bitches in the world.


Anyway. There goes another one of my fetishes that I probably need medication for.

new outkast..

*convulses on the floor*

Andre 3000 - Idlewild Blues

Big Boi - Morris Brown

They're kinda uhh...weird? I guess you can't expect anything different from these niggas though. I really like the hook on Boi's song though. I'll be back later.


Chea@Eskay.

im on a roll...

WHERES THA BUTTA?!

Nah. I just seen this quote from everybodys favorite Crackhead/Rapper/Preacher/Convict....Non other than EARL SIMMONS. (damn, nigga was doomed from the start...he got a dopefiend ass name)


DMX: A lot of people think I'm mean and get scared to talk to me. I have fun too. People are like, "She wants to say hi to you, but...[they are scared]." Like I am going to say, "Hi, you stupid bitch."

mornin' mess...

So anybody who (kinda) knows me, knows that I'm NEVER up this early unless I ain't been to sleep yet. So the cause of me bein up is a dream (nightmare?) I had. I do not know where this came from, for it cannot be a subconscious thought because I find the nigga in the dream utterly repulsive. So heres the dream. Well part of it.


I was goin to the pawn shop, (I know right?) I pull up and park and jump out the car. Which happens to be my moms car for some reason. Then *he gets out, walks past my car, smiles and chunks up the deuces. He has some orange air maxes in his hand. I dont know how many of yall was up on Air Maxes like...8 years ago, they had these DOPE ass Air Max Pluses in orange, electric blue and gray with yellow lines in em (the oranges went sooo fuckin HARD, them was my joints)...and they faded to white in the middle... I got such a shoe fetish it aint funny at all...anyways, he was carryin a pair of those (just like the ones in that pic). I'm guessin he was gonna pawn em. So I had that dream-mare and now I can't go back to sleep.

fuck is goin on?!




* He = 50 Cent.

so i been tagged...

*raises eyebrow*
Fuckin Freaks LoL...



1. HAVE YOU GOTTEN LAID IN 2006?
Yup, and it resulted in me gettin knocked the fuck up. Boyyy was it worth it though =)


2. EVER HAD SEX IN A PUBLIC PLACE?
I dont know if behind the Animal Clinc counts...At the elementary school park (sorry if your kid slid down the big orange twirly slide, cause I'm sure they got some DNA on their ass...which is a coincidence, cuz I did too =x)


3. EVER LAUGH DURING SEX? IF SO WHY?
I chuckle sometimes if I'm uhh..."servicin" my nigga and he makes a lil bitch sound...I try to hold it in, but its funny to me.

4. EVER CRY DURING SEX? IF SO WHY?
Not that I can recall.


5. DO YOU LIKE TO CUDDLE AFTER SEX?
Only with my Sons daddy.


6. EVER REGRET SEX WITH SOMEONE?
HOLY HELL! Yes. "Pyscho-murderer-killer-in-jail-for-life-boy".


7. EVER FAKED AN ORGASM?
Yep. Sometimes I fake it so good, I think I nutted myself.

8. DIRTY TALK, OR SHUT THE FUCK UP?
Quiet sucks. Who just wants to hear flesh? Well I'm sure somebody does, but it aint Nique...

9. EVER HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX:
ASK THE HOOD ABOUT ME, THEY KNOW! Nah. Lemme stop before ya'll start showin up at my door thinkin I'm the neighborhood buss'down. But yeah I have...of course. I'm STD free though.

10. EVER MASTERBATE TO YOUR FRIENDS SIGNIFICANT OTHER?
Nah. Wanted to fuck the daylights outta one of my friends significant others though.

11. EVER HAVE A ONE NIGHT STAND?
Yup. Nigga was goin to Korea the next day.

12. HOW BOUT A 3-SOME?
Nah. I think I'm too selfish for that.

13. EVER WATCH PORN DURING SEX?
YEP. My idea though =/

14. EVER THOUGHT OF SOMEONE ELSE DURING SEX?
I thought of my ex once when I was havin sex with my Sons daddy...and I like instantly dried up, on some Sahara-Desert-Diana-Ross's-Wig type shit.

15. HAS THE CONDOM EVER BROKE? Yes. And I was scared as FUCK.

16. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRISING SEXUAL EXPERIENCE?
My lil cousin walkin in on me and my ex, I was sposed to be babysittin her, but I ended up bein the one who got sat. =)

17. HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU LOST YOUR VIRGINITY?
15 goin on 16.

18. WHO WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE SEX WITH RIGHT NOW?
My Sons Daddy.

19. DO YOU THINK THAT number 18 IS POSSIBLE?
If the war in Iraq ends, it's MORE than possible. Ya'll can call Yung Joc, cuz its gon fuckin GO DOWN!

20. ARE YOU HORNY NOW?
Horny? No. Thirsty? Yes.

21. WOULD U HAVE SEX WITH THE PERSON THAT POSTED THIS?
Well...I posted this. So yeah, I'd have sex with me. Or would I have sex with the person who tagged me? If I was a dude with a soul pole, sign me up lol.

ho, sit down vol 4...

Every now and then I come across some shit thats so incredibly ignorant, funny as shit, or just pissed me the fuck off & I make a nice lil blog about it. These are the Ho Sit Down Diaries, volume 4.


Today was a very tryin day. Sometimes I try to be a good God-Fearin Christian, and sometimes I have to say "fuck it", and let the Brother Malcolm X come out in me. Today, was that day. I was chillin with a girl who used to be my bestfriend back in the day today, and she said somethin that really pissed me the fuck off. She said that her dad told her the reason she cant get a job is cuz she "talks ghetto". Now you already know what I'm thinkin right? How the fuck do you "talk ghetto"? Especially if you NEVER been near a ghetto in your life, and was born and raised in fuckin KANSAS. So I asked her, "What you mean, 'talk ghetto'?" This ho says, "Cuz I say 'ain't' and I use 'be' alot". Maybe my temper is just short, but you can't name me ONE farmin-chewin-wheat-ass white person who DOESN'T use the word "ain't", and SURPRISE, "ain't" is in the dictionary, which makes it a word. I told her "You cant fuckin talk ghetto". Then she acted like she was offended that she didn't "talk ghetto". It just pisses me the fuck off that people are still sayin dumb shit like that in 2006. Thennn she tells me that I "talk ghetto", I literally said "Get the fuck outta here". Nigga, I can speak like I'm educated, dont get the game fucked up...but I'm from the South, whatchu expect? OF COURSE I'mma have a twang, and say "thank" instead of "think", and use words like "nann", "nann'one of" or "bit mo'", but thats my dialect and thats where I come from. Thats some shit I couldn't help if I tried. So dont make it seem like I'm talkin like that to be "cool". I just got so frustrated that I let her keep fuckin talkin, cause if I woulda responded, it probably woulda been with one of my AF1s ascending up her ass. You would think thats it. But oh nooo. Next she talks about The 4th Of July, I told her that I wasnt celebratin that Anglo ass Holiday. *and lets skip the fact that she didn't know who the Anglos are* She asked why. I said "Cause we aint really free", she looked at me like my fuckin name was Anwar Iz-Balari and I was burnin a American flag in her face. "What do you mean?", she asked me. So I started to explain to her how black people will probably NEVER really be free..how we get racially profiled, only picked for certain schools because of our athletic abilities, how they can decrease a neighborhoods property value if black people move in, how we get fucked in the ass by the judicial system and how SOMEWHERE in America a black person is still gettin hung from a tree, or drug through the streets by a chain draggin like a fuckin holiday hog. I know I'm soundin like a black panther here, but I dont give a good gotdamn. She says "Thats not true! America is fair" WHAT. THE. FUCK?! America is fair?! The same America that bombs innocent countries? The same America who tried to fuckin wipe out the ENTIRE Native American race? The same America who let 6 Million Jews be slaughtered? The same America who let the Emitt Till situation happen? Ho, sit down. If America is fair, then I am the mothafuckin head of Al Quaida. Now excuse me if I get a lil hostile, but bitch this is my fuckin culture, this is the shit me and my people live every day, and you tryin to tell me there is NO racism in America? Even people who AINT AMERICAN are racist towards black people. How the fuck you come from a country with no runnin water, and call me a "nigger?". I understand black people ain't the only people who get discrimianted against, yeah, I got that memo, but understand where I'm comin from, and understand who is USUALLY the brunt of these fucked up practices. I'm gettin pissed off just writin this blog yo. Then she thinks 3 Six Mafia is the greatest rap group of all time. Those words have left her lips. HO, SIT DOWN! I'm tired of people fuckin BOTH of my cultures up (black and hip hop). I could go on and fuckin on about this shit, cause it comes to the "Everybody wanna be black, and nobody wanna be black" thing, but thats for another day. Goddamnit! *stomps foot* Anyways, this is my point I think...how can people be so fuckin IGNORANT? What the hell are the standardized tests in High School for?! What is the NEWS for? If you dont know what the fuck you're talkin about, then please proceed to sit the fuck DOWN, because I'm losin my patience with this shit. Really I am. Dont take this shit the wrong way, I'm not racist (much), I'm just proud to be who I am and I dont want people tryin to fuckin tarnish my culture, ya dig?



* the girl I mentioned is Korean. She is married to a black man, go figure.